You cannot not communicate.
It’s one thing to read body language with its eye movement or breathing patterns. It’s another thing all together to engage in reading people by checking the pace, pattern, and length of silence mixed with non-verbal cues (poker “tells”) while never firmly assuming their intent. Listen with an open hand. In the social media and web presence world – verbal tells can be hidden in text.
Example: Where they look when you address cost. If they glance at a picture of their family or play with a wedding ring every time price is mentioned, it could mean that they trust their spouse’s opinion on these topics, or that they’re gauging the effect on their family or kids. All resources pull from somewhere else. Consideration of family could reflect the pain that pulls them away from saying ‘yes’ or the pleasure that is drawing them toward saying ‘yes’.
What does it mean to communicate?
Communication is a process of decoding others’ thoughts expressed with words, and filtering delivered content through my personal experience—back into thoughts (based on me).
The more secure I am in understanding myself, the stronger base I have for knowing others.
For Instance: Them or Me?
Even as I read the blogs I’ve written, I catch myself thinking of others that need to change. How do I handle people that demand my attention when all that I struggle with is based on their words and their actions?
- How does their understanding of my past experiences draw and repel that individual?
- What am I trying to fix or grow or ignore in that person?
- If nothing ever changes—will my life be better to struggle, compromise, or give in?
Test Questions: (sometimes making it a game, makes it easier)
What’s my purpose in engaging him or her? What is in my control to make it more fun?
This brave new social interaction based business environment that is the world wide web requires an intentional, focused, and measured strategy for social interaction. Learn the rules of your target audience’s social circles and listen with your eyes.